Stardust: Galaxy Daddy

(Intro: Epic guitar riff, heavy drums, and chaotic synth explosions)

[Verse 1]

(Stardust voice: deep and dramatic)

I LIVE ON A STAR, FAR OUT IN SPACE!

PRIVATE PROPERTY—GET OUTTA MY FACE!

I FLY THROUGH THE COSMOS ON LIGHT WAVES OF DOOM,

BLOWIN' UP VILLAINS FROM PLANETS TO TOMB!

I HEARD YOUR RADIO, "HELP, WE'RE SCREWED!"

TERRORISTS ON EARTH? WELL, THAT'S JUST RUDE!

SO I TELEPORTED IN, WITH A FLASHY STAR SHINE,

YOUR SNIPERS? YOUR BOMBERS? NOW THEY'RE ALL MINE!

[Chorus]

(Stardust and chorus: epic and absurd)

STARDUST! SUPER WIZARD KING!

FIRING RAYS OF CRAZY THINGS!

DISINTEGRATE! MAGNETIC SWAY!

I’M THE COSMIC FREAK YOU FEAR TODAY!

[Verse 2]

(Stardust voice: angrier, unhinged)

THEN CAME THE SUPER FIEND, SET MARS ON FIRE,

TRIED TO RAM THAT PLANET INTO EARTH LIKE A TIRE!

BUT I KICKED HIS ASS TO MARS WITH A SCREAM,

NOW HE'S ROASTING ALONE IN HIS BURNING DREAM!

AND KAOS? WITH HIS VULTURE CREW?

WANTED A BRIDE? DUDE, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!

I TURNED HIM INTO A WORM, SENT HIM BACK TO VENUS,

NOW HE’S BIRD SNACKS—HA! THAT’S GENIUS!

[Bridge]

(Spoken interlude, over dramatic drums and bass)

(Stardust, growling)

Oh, you think you can stop me, Demon?

With your earthquake machine?

I threw you INTO YOUR OWN TSUNAMI, BRO!

AND THEN DISINTEGRATED YOUR BODY IN FRONT OF NEW YORK CITY!

BOOM! SKYWRITING MESSAGE: "YOU’RE SAFE, LOVE STARDUST."

(Chorus breaks in, wild and chaotic)

[Chorus]

STARDUST! SUPER WIZARD KING!

PUNCHING ALIENS AND TERRIBLE THINGS!

ANTI-GRAVITY! SKELETON RAYS!

YOU CAN’T ESCAPE MY WIZARDY WAYS!

[Verse 3]

(Stardust, completely unhinged)

I WEAR STAR-METAL SKIN, I’M IMMUNE TO PAIN!

YOUR BOMBS? YOUR GUNS? THEY DRIVE ME INSANE!

MY RAYS MAKE MURDERERS SEE THEIR DEAD!

THEY SCREAM, THEY CRY, THEN THEY’RE FILLED WITH DREAD!

I’M IMMORTAL, UNSTOPPABLE, COSMICLY HOT,

I WRITE FLAMING MESSAGES JUST TO SHOW OFF A LOT!

“HEY EARTH, IT’S ME, YOUR GALACTIC DADDY!”

NOW STOP BEING DUMB O